Garbage Day: ENTOURAGE SEASON 8 BALDERDASH

Written by Shawn Lotte September 20, 2011

Welcome to Garbage Day where I, Doctor Lotte, will talk about things that I don’t like, and some things I do, but mostly I will talk about shit. Relax, enjoy and don’t forget to take out your trash.

Today’s Garbage: Entourage Season 8 Can Stop Being a Real Thing Now.

Look at them, having fun, being happy. If only they knew what was in store for them in season 8.

Before we get started there is something that my 3 loyal readers should know about me: I don’t watch much television. WHAT?! It’s true and when I do find a show I really like I get into it hard; racing through all the episodes and eagerly anticipating the next season.

That’s what happened with Entourage. I watched all the episodes in a month leading up to season 7, and then watched each episode as they were released. I really love the show. It’s well produced and well written. Its characters are engrossing and well thought out, and with the backdrop of movies, I truly feel the show was made for my sensibilities. My favorite characters are Turtle and Ari. Turtle because he represents me the most with being a little lazy, but in the end wants to prove his own self worth, and Ari because he’s a dick, but a dick who loves his family and can still be a genuinely great person. To the point, I love Entourage and I will look back fondly on season 1-7.

Look at them, staring off into the sunset. Happy and ahhh fuck it. Same joke, new picture.

As for season 8, FUCK SEASON 8!!!!! I was eagerly awaiting what would happen in the final season and guess what? I was not happy. I had an inkling that this season would suck when I heard it was only going to be 8 episodes. Now granted most of the previous seasons have only been 12, excluding season 3, which was 20, but seriously I did not think they could wrap everything up in 8 half hour episodes. I was right, they couldn’t and it pissed me off. So here I am going to give you a quick list of the things that REALLY FUCKING SUCKED in the final season of Entourage.

Spoilers ahead: I ruin shit here so don’t read on if you haven’t seen season 7 and 8 of Entourage.

–       I wanted to see what happened to Vince and his crew after he was busted for drugs at the end of season 7. Don’t end a season with a gut punch and then come back to it not having seen any of the good stuff.

–       Sloan and E are now NOT getting married now. When did that happen? Oh well, I guess we get to see E get all pissy again.

–       Turtle gets dumped by another hot girl and is told by her father. Lame, at least have her come back for an episode and not talk about her as if she disappeared from existence.

–       Not enough Lloyd in this season. WE WANT MORE LLOYD!

"Yes Ari I know I am not in this season much, but my name is in the credits. That's better than nothing right?"

–       Drama’s storyline is fine, but I don’t like Drama cause he is a whiner and fucks everything up for himself.

–       The cameos sucked this season: Jamie Kennedy really? Come on.

–       This one is the topper: In the second to last episode Vince goes after this reporter who turns him down. So what does any rich handsome man do: makes a video tape of all his past fucks (yes I say fucks cause that’s what they were) and has them say what a great guy he is. So after that bullshit she agrees to a date with the now Vince the creeper (Trademark me). That ends the 7th episode. When we start the FINAL EPISODE Vince tells the boys he is getting married, a decision made in less than 24 hours. WHAT THE FUCK! NO FUCKING WAY. WHAT WERE THE WRITERS THINKING? This is piss poor writing and a cheap way to manipulate the audience and force a turning point in a characters life. Sure Vince is spontaneous, but come the fuck on. I hated this revelation and despised everything that came from it.

+      The only good thing was that Ari gets what he wants, his wife back, and is happy…or is he?

That’s it for another Garbage day. Check out my review of Drive with Ryan Gosling later this week.

Love, Shawn Lotte

P.S. Here is a video of some of the greatest moments by one of the greatest characters.

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